Life Comes In Stages, Trust the Process
As a child, I was very eager to “grow up.” Of course, I didn’t know the challenges that come with being an adult. I would ask my mum questions like “How would I get a job?”, “How would I take care of my family?” and my mum would tell me to take things one day at a time. She would tell me that as I get older, I would gradually acquire the knowledge I need to navigate through life. That life comes in stages and I should trust the process.
You can understand that those words didn’t make much sense to me as a child. Life is a lot more black and white at that age. But with age and maturity, you start to understand that life is a lot more complex. It’s full of uncertainties and grey areas. And sometimes, the best thing you can do is to focus on what is in your front. It could be school, learning a skill or doing a job.
You should reduce the time you spend worrying about things you can’t control. It would only cause you unnecessary anxiety. Your entire life is a series of processes and as you go through it, the layers get peeled back gradually and each stage reveals unique challenges and opportunities. But if you trust and follow the process, you will be well-equipped to navigate the challenges and take advantage of the opportunities.
Everything is a Process
One of the things I find very fascinating is how a caterpillar turns into a butterfly. The nitty-gritty details are just as intriguing but here’s the general gist: that the caterpillar hatches from an egg, stuffs itself with leaves and stops at some point, and spins itself a cocoon in which it undergoes some processes. The result of this transformation is a beautiful butterfly.
This reminds me that if you look around you, you will find several processes going on every day. From schools to banks, to companies and governments, we observe various processes every day. The entire universe can be summed up as a series of processes that have happened over a long period. As such, it’s important to trust the process. It would save you time chasing after shadows and help you to grow constantly.
The Importance of Trusting the Process
It’s important to trust the process of life because life is beautifully unpredictable. There are many things that you can’t control and as such, you can’t predict the outcome. This means that sometimes things won’t go according to your plans. You make all the necessary preparations but still have things fall apart. This doesn’t mean that you should not make plans, it means that you should continue to trust the process even when things don’t go your way.
Life is beautifully unpredictable
A couple of years back, I set the goal for myself that I wanted to start working remotely. At the time, I had already been learning programming for a while but I didn’t know how to get a remote job. I had to start from somewhere so I started by learning how to make a CV, cover letter and applying for jobs. Then I learned about handling interviews and technical assessments. I got a couple of interviews here and there but got several rejections.
Anyone who’s been through the job-hunting process understands that it can be mentally exhausting. Through it all, I had to continue to remind myself to trust the process. My mum would always say all you can do is continue to do what you can. Eventually, things will come together in your favour. What I could do at the time was to keep improving my skills and applying for jobs and so I did just that. In good time, I started getting positive responses and job opportunities and I’ve been working remotely ever since.
Trusting the process doesn’t mean you won’t face challenges. It just means you would have enough resolve to keep going until you achieve your goals.
Learning to Trust the Process
I acknowledge that in this modern day of social media and the internet, we are constantly bombarded with a constant stream of information. Most of us have role models we follow on social media, people we look up to and admire greatly. Successful people inspire us to believe that we can also be successful. We are mesmerized when we hear stories of how they attained great success despite the odds.
We read the success stories, and we see the glamour on social media but we are not privileged enough to be part of their process. That side is reserved for close friends and family or those interested enough to find out. Every day, social media feeds us with more and more success stories. This is not a bad thing by any means, but it creates a sense of pressure on us. We see the pinnacle of their success so much that we forget it didn’t happen overnight.
It’s critical to learn to give yourself time to grow and to learn how to trust the process. A few things you can do to help you with this are:
- Being present — When you spend time with people, reduce any distractions. Limit phone usage, have honest conversations and learn about their experiences and perspectives.
- Set realistic goals — Very often, we make the mistake of setting big goals that are not feasible in the short term. This could lead to getting overwhelmed or frustrated when the results don’t show quickly. It’s much better to set smaller achievable goals that can help you build momentum that grows your confidence. With growing confidence, you can driven to get to your bigger goals.
- Celebrate small wins — one thing I like to do after any little win is to “mark” it. This could be getting my favourite meal, taking myself out or something along those lines. It helps you to build the motivation to create more moments for celebration.
- Learn from your mistakes and ask for help — no one knows everything so along the way, you will make mistakes. When you do, try to correct yourself. If you run into challenges that seem too big, ask for help. It’s a long road ahead and it’s helpful to have allies.
At the end of the day, life can be long or short, depending on your perspective. It’s essential to trust the process and do what you should do when you should do it so you don’t end up with any regrets. We don’t know if there’s another life after this so if indeed this is the only you get, you might as well give it your best shot.
